With time, the world of children is also changing. Education, civilization, and their peers have started having such an effect on the child that the children started doing according to what the parents said without arguing, such examples will be seen very rarely. Even parents no longer believe in keeping their children under tight control.
Because psychologists have proved that by putting a lot of pressure on children, their mental and physical powers do not develop fully. As a result, children are not able to fully play their part in the struggle of life. For this, some suggestions are given in the following article.
After all, the child has some intelligence of his own. Everyone has learned to walk by falling, but what is the wisdom to stop a child from walking because of the fear of falling? When the child’s intelligence is developed under the care of the parents, then he gets the knowledge to understand the evil and the good. Once a hand is burnt, no child puts his hand in the fire again.
Don’t be bound by the rules – a child is a child after all. Like the elders, he is unfamiliar with the rules of society. Therefore the parents must use only the right methods with love and sympathy.
The child has two stances regarding obedience. One is to obey happily without any pressure because they have faith and love for the person who is giving them orders. The second approach is when the child knows that the person who is giving orders to him is jealous of him or that his attitude is biased or is unfit to give orders, in such a situation the child will obey only in helplessness.
Many children catch such stubbornness that they do not care about anyone’s orders except their parents’ orders. Such a habit is bad. The habit of cooperation and the nature of working together should be inculcated in the child through play and play.
So don’t do any good deed just out of feeling that it will make mom happy or dad will be angry by not doing it. But do it with the thought that this is the right thing to do and parents are happy by doing the work. It will be beneficial that he will not limit the good work to any particular person.
Be consistent in your orders- While scolding or punishing the child for his bad deed, keep in mind that when he commits the offense, he should be scolded or explained at the same time. After a day or two, scolding or punishing for the same mistake, sometimes leaving it does not affect the child’s mind, on the contrary, he becomes irritated.
If a child has committed a crime, do not show too much trouble on your part, otherwise, the child will start to understand such a specialty in himself that he can gain importance by troubling you. One should act patiently in the matter of improvement of children.
While giving punishment, it is important to keep in mind that it does not destroy the self-esteem of the child. Therefore it is appropriate to scold him by calling him in solitude. After getting the punishment, there should not be any guilt in the child or it will create a feeling of inferiority in him. The attitude of the parents should be toward the child and not the policeman who punishes them. No child is born bad.
Children have committed many crimes because they do not know right and wrong. Therefore, what action you consider to be wrong maybe it has been done unknowingly, should be explained in a less stoic manner. Never take your anger out on the child. In such a situation, you will be harassing the child.
Parents should keep in mind whether a child is listening carefully and understanding or not. They interrupt the child for the matter, whether he himself is not in them because setting an example is more important than preaching. Children imitate evil rather than good.
The conflict between the parents will also have a bad effect on the child and it will become disorderly. You should also keep in mind the age of the children. While ordering, keep the following things in mind
1. Give orders to the child keeping in mind the strength, ability, and age, and make sure to follow them from the child.
2. You should not always change the way of giving orders and the method of work. Otherwise, the child will not be able to get acquainted with your ways and nature.
3. Your behavior should not be that of a manipulative child or a tyrannical dictator. To take your attention away from the game. If he has enough time to obey you, he will not rebel against you again.
4. It is more appropriate to order something to be done than to do it yourself. Ask him to cooperate in that – come, son! Just pick up your toys and keep them, so the order should not be negative as far as possible. It is better to bring his attention to some good deed than to be interrupted.
5. While ordering your voice should not be overly prescriptive but as a love request When you ask the child to work, that time you should keep in mind whether he is understanding by listening carefully to you or not?
6.Never allow him to do the work for which you once punished him. Otherwise, your instructions will have no effect on him.
7. If you have promised to threaten or reward the child, then you must follow both things, otherwise both your fear of threat and the credibility of the talk will be lost.
8. Do not have distrust in the child. Don’t defame him. This discourages the child because infamy is worse than bad.
9. If there is any defect or defect in a child, do not let it settle in his heart that you hate. But tell them that you dislike that evil and that letting go of this evil will make him a very good kid.
On doing a good deed or doing as you said, you encourage him by saying ‘Well done. Awaken the thought in his mind that since the child is a good boy, it is against his habit and pride to do bad deeds. In this way, children will be inclined towards good things themselves. Wise parents make children obedient and dutiful in similar ways
Once the child’s annual examination was near, he was very weak in mathematics but hence he did not feel like practicing mathematics. Mother caressing him said- son, you are so smart about this matter. Now you will definitely come first in your class. After all, it is my child, I was also the first in my childhood. Hearing this, the child hung his face and said – “But mother! Our maths is very weak. Because of this, our position falls.” The mother cried out and said – “Hey son! What’s the big deal, from tomorrow we both will do maths, I’ll make you all in ten days. I’ll teach you questions.”
The child excitedly asked – “Really mother! From tomorrow you will teach me. Well, then I will definitely practice maths.” Just, from the second day onwards, the child’s mother taught the child two or four tricks of mathematics. After getting encouragement from the mother, the child made up his shortfall, while the master was defeated by saying ten times, but the boy did not bring it by doing mathematics. The person who gives orders by understanding the child’s ability and ‘mood’, does not have difficulty in getting the child’s cooperation.
Children gladly give their mental and physical support to obey his orders. Coercive or intimidating acts make children swindlers and hypocrites On such an occasion the child will be suppressed, but it is not beneficial for the child to be persuaded to say this. The child should be happy to obey your orders, he understands that parents ask for his good, they love him, and to say to his loving parents, please them with their good deeds, he too Pleasure and enjoyment. This is possible only when you are a tolerant parent, not a regulatory inspector towards the child, then the child will definitely be your obedience.